Jesus' perspective on divorce

Last Wednesday we were talking about how to control anger, which is one of the principles of the Kingdom of God, one of those things that Jesus wants us as his disciples to have, things through which we can conform to the desire of the heart of God, is that we can be people who can control those feelings of anger in our hearts, and know how to reconcile differences with other people, both with those who are closest to us and with our relatives as well as with anyone else around us. .

And I obviously thought, or one of the things that I had mentioned, is that the idea of this message when Jesus is communicating it, remember, I rather do this to refresh our memory, that what Jesus is doing here is, yes he is speaking to a whole crowd but rather he is speaking to his disciples, he wants the disciples to understand what it means to live for him and for him, that it is not a matter that we want to mold Jesus to our needs, if not that we have to conform to Him and to His heart's desire. It is not that He has to function according to our patterns but rather that we have to function according to the patterns that He has for us his disciples.

And one of the areas that we are going to see now, was in verse 26, chapter 5 of Matthew verse 26, and I am identifying this point as the need to be able to live with integrity and respect towards people of the opposite gender, especially when refers to the marital context. And I tell them to talk about this issue, especially in the time that the Church has had to live, it is not easy, because there are many people who have suffered in the context of marriage, there are many people who have suffered in different ways, there are people who have experienced one or two divorces, there are people with a type of violence or abuse, or neglect so to speak, one of the parties to the marriage decided to leave because they couldn't take it anymore, but as I say this I also see that there are marriages that they are living in the blessing of God, that there are couples that are seeing the hand of God working in their midst.

And in the midst of this dynamic, my brothers, is the Church. The Church is there to strengthen those marriages that are moving forward, and those people who come from failed experiences, from experiences where marriage has been more painful than beneficial, the Church is also there to strengthen, heal, and Help restore those people. And how do we do it? The question is how do we do it, ah, through pastoral counseling, yes, that is a part, that is only a part of something more comprehensive.

We understand my brothers that marriage is the foundation of our society. If you look at it, all of society is made up of families, in one way or another, some people who live alone, who would be labeled as single, who are living their lives alone, they are part of a family nucleus too, It is not that they are isolated people, or that they are here in the world by mistake, they are all part of a family nucleus, of a family context, there are families that are very small, that are father, mother, and son, whatever, there are families that are very extensive, that are withdrawn from children, eight, twelve, from that time when there was no television, that the numbers continue. I don't know how many are from a family like that, from a very large family, from that time when there was no television, or there was television but you couldn't watch it, you went a lot to, (laughs), I like that, it's good.

Today more than ever we have to see the family nucleus. But the family nucleus as defined by Scripture, in the Bible my brothers we have examples of families that were not the best either, in the Bible there are dramas that can be made novels with them. You have seen, the Pastor has shared Rebecca novels with Jacob and Isaac, and all the deceptions that are given, but even in the midst of those dramas God is fulfilling his purposes, and it is not that we are going to say but oh, the Bible is full of bad stories, no, it's not that, there are stories that are also good. Look, for example, in the Song of Songs, look at the relationship between these two people, they present a healthy, beautiful love relationship, where he is giving himself to this woman and this woman is giving herself to him and they are growing together in that relationship. Mary and Joseph, Mary the mother of Jesus, although the relationship started out a little turbulent, but anyway they managed to stay together and God blessed that union.

So we have good stories, not very good stories, but all of that is there to inform us and how to lead our lives today. And one of those my brothers, who really shows up in this text when Jesus talks about adultery, look, I tell you, whether you are a husband or a wife, that you are here and you know someone who is married, or if you are dating, girlfriends and they are thinking of getting married, look, one of the biggest areas of attack for every marriage is that, it is the aspect of infidelity. One of the things when I speak here to couples who are seeking marriage, pre-marital or marriage counseling, one of the things I say is, look, you have to look out for each other, when we talk about issues of sexual intimacy, Sexual intimacy is not only for pleasure, to be experienced between the couple, or for the procreation of children, I dare say today that sex is intended to protect the couple as well.

That in that sense where the husband gives himself to the wife and the wife gives herself to the husband, that one is covering a front there so that neither of them is going to be looking at the grass of the neighbor next door, as the man rightly said. Pastor once: "the grass above the fence can be seen greener, and it looks like a carpet, like a golf course, the grass on the other neighbor, but when you get closer that grass has the same holes, the The same stones, the same little yellow flowers, it has them too." In other words, it is something that has to be taken care of, it is a relationship that has to be taken care of, one has to take care of oneself through one's eyes, that one's eyes are always looking fully, I think as Job says at one point, I made a pact with my eyes not to look at a young girl.

And today, before, that was said as advice for men, but that is also said as advice for women, both are exposed to that today, and at the same time, my brothers, I believe that within the marital context, much of that protection is due to the respect that they give to each other, husband to wife, the respect that they give to each other, very interesting because well, there are many books that talk about this, but one in particular says that one of the most important needs A woman's greatest need is love, and a man's greatest need is respect. If a man does not feel respected by his wife, he will not give love. If a woman does not feel loved by a man, she will not respect him. , and these are fronts my brothers that each one in that relationship has to be very aware of it.

And it's not like it's something good, I had talked about this a long time ago, that it's something unconditional as well as conditional, it's both, they go hand in hand, because that love that God wants us to give is an unconditional love that I can loving my spouse just as she is, with her ups and downs, but just the way she is, and at the same time for me to be able to give that love will depend on how I receive from her as well, that's something that it goes both ways. And here one has to be careful, my brothers, because both men and women when something gets between our eyes, no, I'm not going to do anything until he does what I expect, you have to be very careful there, because that sense of pride can break a marriage relationship. When I let pride get in the way of that sense of love that God wants me to reflect with my spouse, I am already there killing that relationship. I can't let that root of pride break something so vital and so precious that God wants us to nurture.

And another thing they have to be careful with is those fantasies that sometimes get into their heads. In English you say the what if, how would you say that? one leaves in that cloud, and one begins to imagine that wow, my life would have been like that, and like that, listen, come down from that cloud and come back to reality, because that's what it is, a fantasy. How many people have been carried away by those fantasies and when they find out who that so-and-so was, and they decide to make a life there, they say "oh, I wish I could go back to so-and-so," and start fantasizing about the one they had or the one they had before. I'm being honest, I mean, I don't want to cover the sun with one hand, I can't do it, and if I do I'm going to cover my face because it's the only way I can do it, I'm going to go blind.

We have to take care of those fronts my brothers, and obviously I say it from the perspective of a man towards a woman, the woman is the most beautiful creation that God could have created. With her scents, with her curves, look, the woman is the most beautiful thing that God could have created without a doubt, and the man too, he created him first that the woman has to be beautiful too. Men, clap yourselves too. Here are strong men, full of the vigor of God, of the vitality of God, men and women in process, I have to say it that way. And when I'm in front of a beautiful woman I recognize it, obviously, it's not that I'm going to go off talking, I can't do that, I'm telling you, there are men on the street who when a woman passes them stay like that, looking like that, if they saw how ridiculous they look

You have to be careful with those things. Women tend to be a little more hidden, discreet. But it happens as you want. And look, it is as I always say, I have always been very honest with this, and it is, I could say that it is our theology in our Church, look my sisters, I know that we live in a society where fashion is one of the most important things, there is a very fine line between what one can understand as acceptable and unacceptable fashion, but one has to be careful, I believe that God puts a sensitivity on you as a woman, when you look in the mirror, yes what you are wearing is very revealing, look feel free to go back to your closet and look at something that is less revealing, this is how you take care of your brothers in the Church, look how I am saying it, you take care of your brothers in the Church like that.

Think of it as a family, you want to look good for your husband, your wife, you want to look good for her, but when you come to a Church context, when we are in a larger group, we always have to think of a more proactive of one to be thinking, always be careful. We are a Church but we are a very open Church, very diverse, and one never knows the struggles that a person has. I am going to put it like this, think about taking care of us Pastors, if you come with a very short skirt and you cross your legs, and one is preaching, you can be sure that I am not going to look in your direction , because that can be somewhat distracting, I am not going to look there, so if one does not look in that direction all the people in that direction are ignoring the people on that side and that they are only preaching to others, but rather We do it my brothers to take care of each other, and that is something that has to dominate in the mind.

Just by living in light of the morality that the Lord Jesus is teaching us, and obviously here is a point that we have to cover, because the perspective of Jesus, divorce, which is also something that is greatly affecting our Church, I don't know if you remember last Sunday, that Pastors Roberto and Meche felt praying for the couples of the Church, young couples, couples who have been married for a long time, and one of the things that Pastora Meche was sharing is one of the things that, the divorce statistics are almost the same and there are times even greater than regular people, and that hurts, it is something that bothers, and bothers the heart of God. And one wonders, what is the Church doing, what is it not doing to take care of those marital relationships? May those marriages grow solid, strong in the person of Jesus.

Now my brothers, I again, I know that here are people who have lived that experience and are people who are being restored and restored by God. But at the same time, we who are living in our marital relationship, look, we have to take care of those relationships, and that divorce cannot be an alternative. Obviously, we understand that if it is a marital relationship that is an abuse that is being committed and after several counseling sessions, after prayer, after rebuke of demons that situation continues, look get away from there, because you are receiving more damage What a blessing in that relationship.

If obviously, biblically it has been a situation of adultery, if after a restoration it doesn't work, there is the permission too, but like this, oh I got tired of this person, I'm leaving, I'm going to look for the man or woman of my dreams , no no, those are the world's standards, and we cannot live by those standards, we have to take care of those relationships that are so important and that depend a lot on where we are today, it is more important where we are today.

Look, I was reading a book by Professor Villafañe, and he mentions that in this postmodern society, which are the times in which we are living, that there are some ideologies that say that there is no kind of absolute truth, and people rebels against authority, and whatever one says, people quickly rebel against it. If you see us, our doctrine is a doctrine that is based on an absolute truth, and it is the truth of God, the truth of Jesus, and there is an authority that comes from that, and so when we started to preach yes, that marriages have to be healthy, yes they have to be strong, and demonstrate that intimacy that is vital, that reflects the intimacy of God as well. If we as believers are not living in light of that, what example are we setting for the people out there?

We lose credibility, we lose authority, when we come to say no, this is the truth, but sorry, hello, look at your life, and what Elvin Villafañe says, today more than ever society needs a strong, robust Church that can live In light of these principles, if I tell you, my brothers, the challenge is great, the challenge is great, but if God is with us, we can manage to live up to this. If we continue to make the Lord the foundation of our lives and do not let ourselves be carried away by our selfish whims, many times we want to get away with it always at the expense of our spouse, or we are always looking at the negative things of the spouse instead of looking positive things and exalt those things, because believe me it's easy to look at the negative.

If I tell you now, make me a list of the good things and the bad things about your spouse, I am sure that the good things will be a much longer list than the good ones. (Laughter), only one person has good things and another has bad things, but I dare say do that exercise, you have a task today, those who are married, obviously, whoever gets a droplet gets wet When you get home, those who are married make a list, on one page divide it in half, in one column mention the good things you can say about your spouse and the other mention the not very good things you can say about your spouse. spouse, and see which one will be longer. If the negative things are longer there are problems. Even if it happens, well if it's like a difference of one, there's a good balance there, but if we're talking about a difference of 5, 6, 7, 8 things, look, there are problems.

And it is true, there are problems because we are living in a reality that is difficult, and there is no effort that we can make to see the positive things that our spouse has, by doing this exercise, my brothers, you are going to help protect your marriage. (Laughs), you are going to be protecting your marriage and therefore you are going to be protecting your family, when we manage to live in light of that my brothers look, love the person that God has placed next to you, look, yes to your brother, to his sister, but I'm talking about the marriage context. If that person next to you looks, it is a person who is in the process just like you, but ask God for the power, strength and grace to love that person. When we live in the light of that love, things become more possible, and there in that mystery that you do not know how God may be touching the life of your spouse as well, and if you need counseling services, we are here, we are more than willing to help him with that, so I ended the ad there.

I continue with the sermon on the mount, a little point and I am closing with this, this is something that I like, in verse 33, Jesus is saying the following, this is a point that I like because it is to be careful with things what one says, and I am learning with this day by day because there are things that one puts in, sorry, there are times when one makes mistakes, one is overcommitted by the things one says, and one has to learn to control that language. There is a chapter in James that talks about the tongue and how one has to learn to control it. I spoke about a sermon in which I met a gentleman, and this gentleman entered and we were talking, and in the middle of our conversation he said this proverb, that one is the master of what is silent and the slave of what is spoken, that is It stuck in my head.

And one has to be careful. Jesus is speaking of an oath, He says, but I tell you, do not swear in any way, neither by heaven, which is the Throne of God, nor by Earth, which is his footstool, nor by Jerusalem, which is the city of the Great King, You will not swear by your head, nor will you swear by your mother, no, I added that, because you cannot make a single hair white or black, if not that you speak, that your yes be yes and your no be no. This is how we have to proceed, my brothers, even those cultural perspectives, because I know that this is in our culture, look, lend me that money and I swear on my great-grandmother that I'll pay you back next week. And the week keeps being buried seven feet deeper because we don't keep promises. And one has to be careful with that.

Look, just yesterday I got involved in a conversation that, uh!, then I said wow, I looked back and said Omar, you screwed up, yes I have to say it, I screwed up in that conversation because I committed myself by saying things that he shouldn't have said, just because of the context in which the conversation was taking place. And one has to learn to discern that, my brothers, we have to be careful, if you compromise in one way or another with your words, we have to learn to live in light of that. If you promise to pray for someone, a very simple example, pray for that person, don't say that I'm going to pray for you and three weeks later say oh, if I said I was going to pray for this person and I didn't, No, at least that same day when you get in the car, pray for the person. If you say look, I'm going to help you coordinate this activity, when the day of the activity arrives, don't say no, it's because the boss put me to work overtime, and I can't, you promised to help, and well I know that things happen, but if you promised to help, do everything to help.

No, things definitely happen sometimes, I've said yes I'll be there, and when I'm on my way I get a call and I say oops, I have to call another person and say look, I'm sorry but I won't be able to make it, I know that things have happened, but you know when things happen and when, hm, things haven't happened, it's because you're slipping out of there, you have to learn to live up to that standard, that your yes be yes and your don't be no

And look at that aspect of the no, it is also very difficult because in the context of the Church it is very difficult to say no. There are times when we want to please the people around us so much and when you come to see you commit yourself to so many things, that one of those things is going to slip through your fingers, it is also a lesson that I continue to learn . Look last Sunday, I ended up involved in four things and I don't know how I managed to fulfill the four things, with the last cartridge I had left I managed to fulfill the four things, but it was not my desire, it was not my desire because I felt that I was failing because look, in two of the activities that I committed to I had to leave halfway, and one feels like things were incomplete, like I couldn't fulfill the site that I promised, look I have to go because I have to go to this other side now.

Yeah, it's not nice. Because look, who knows if in those activities there was someone who wanted to talk about something a little more personal that perhaps in the context of the Church one is more aware, we have to talk about this, but look, it's a little more closed, someone maybe I wanted to sit down, open up a little, and oh, I'm sorry, I have to go, and that person stays like who says with the wish to the air, it's fine another day. One has to learn, if someone tells you not to look, don't worry, the time will come when you can have that person in your home, whether they are a Pastor or not, but one has to learn to live a balanced life, I end with this, why do I say that you have to live a balanced life, my brothers? There are times when that family nucleus has to be taken care of so as not to have too busy an agenda.

I don't think so, this is me personally speaking, this is me, it's not that I'm criticizing, but there are Churches that are meeting every night of the week, on Monday there is such a thing, on Tuesday there is such a thing, on Wednesday there is such a thing, such a thing on Thursday, such a thing on Friday, Saturday morning a morning session, and Sunday there are two services and at night there is another, when I see those things like that I say wow but where will the family life of those people?, because there are leaders who are coordinating, and there are times when the same leader is tut tut tut tut tut, all those, brothers we have to learn to take care of our lives, of their personal lives.

Look, at some point or another, a fuse is going to blow, and I'd rather share a barbecue at his house than go see him in a hospital bed, mind you, I'm not saying that being in Church is bad, but I do believe that the Church should promote that balance in the families that make up that Church. There are families that need to go out to eat a shortbread together at night, or an ice cream, there are families that need to do that, as I also understand that the Church has to meet and seek God by fire, because the moment warrants it, so do I I believe that, thank you, there is time for everything, and in that you have to learn to live, when there is time for everything, there are times when the balance is going to go more to one side than the other, but we always have to try to make that stability may be there for us to be able to live in light of what the Lord asks of us.

We are going to pray so that the Lord helps us my brothers to understand and know how to live in the light of these words, nothing I have said I have said to make anyone feel bad, and the brothers who can see me through the internet You know the line I am following very well, but I do believe my brothers that every day we have to learn to live in light of these things, I myself am learning to live in light of this, I know how important it is for me to know how to commit myself to this Church, and at the same time I know how important it is to commit myself to my wife, my children, and to know how to give them the time they need and that they deserve. I also know how important it is to take time for myself and renew my strength, you don't want to see Pastor Omar all wrinkled by a raisin, grumpy, you don't want to see me like this, so let's learn that, your husband doesn't want to see you all wrinkled all the time i'm tired i'm agitated i'm anxious and you don't want to see your husband there either all crouchy all aaarrr where's the food i'm tired don't talk to me no we gotta live lives full, plentiful

If Jesus said we must live in light of what that means, an abundant life, and the abundant life of the Lord is manifested in all those aspects. So my brothers, points for tonight, let's take care of our family, today your husband or your wife, if they are here or not, if you have them by your side or not, when you get home, talk, how can I take care of you How can you take care of me, how can we live a balanced life, how can I give you the respect that you need, how can I give you the love that you need, talk to each other honestly, don't fight, talk to each other, oh but Pastor Omar we've already been thirty, forty years married, look, there are still things to know, there is something locked up there that you can know.

And if you have had a somewhat difficult marital experience, look, believe too, that the Lord is there to heal that experience. God can do all things. Even if you have lost your spouse and you are alone, alone, without wanting it, look, God is with you to be your husband, your wife, believe it that way, believe it that way.

Dear God, I thank you for the opportunity you give us to share these words. It is not easy to share these words, I know that they are delicate, sensitive topics, but Father, we speak them with confidence, knowing that You know how to apply this Word to each heart. Father, if I said something that was out of place, I apologize, you know that it is not my intention, and apart from my imperfection as I wish, I ask that You use Your Word and reach every heart, reach every family, reach every nucleus marriage, whatever the experiences that marriage is living, whatever the struggle they have lived, may it be You revealing Your desires for each of those marriages, Lord. Those people who are being restored by losses or somewhat difficult marriages, may Your love abound much more than ever.

Those couples who are just starting out, may it be You helping them to take off to a fruitful, vital, healthy relationship Lord, those couples who have been together for years Lord, in a mysterious way I ask that You help them day after day to return to that moon of honey, those early stages, so that love can continue to be renewed day after day, renewed in Your love above all things.

Father bless Your people, I ask that these words encourage us to move forward and get closer to You, to know how to take care of what You give us and to know how to give you the time that You ask of us too. Take us safely to our homes, take us with Your blessing, that You grant us a deep, restful rest, and that tomorrow if You allow it, my God, we can get up with new strength to face what tomorrow may bring. We give you thanks for this time, Lord, and to you we give all the glory and all the honor, in the name of Jesus, amen and amen. God bless you my brothers, say hello to each other, we'll see you next time, blessings.